Extra-soft brushes definitely helped us too, but honestly, I’m still not sure we ever found the magic solution. My kid would just clamp her mouth shut and glare at me like I was trying to steal her teeth, not clean them. I tried letting her “brush” my teeth first—kind of worked, kind of messy. Anyone else’s kid insist on using their finger instead of a brush? We had a whole phase with that... not ideal for plaque, but at least she wasn’t screaming.
My kid would just clamp her mouth shut and glare at me like I was trying to steal her teeth, not clean them.
That visual made me laugh—been there, totally relate. It’s wild how something as simple as brushing can turn into a full-on standoff. We had a similar “finger brushing” phase, too. I remember thinking, well, at least some kind of cleaning is better than nothing, right? Sometimes you just have to pick your battles and keep it positive.
Honestly, the mess from letting them brush *your* teeth is real. I used to dread it, but it did seem to give my daughter a sense of control, which helped a little. In my experience, the more we made it about fun—songs, silly faces, letting her pick her own toothbrush—the less resistance we got. But yeah, there’s no magic fix, and some days are just harder than others.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. The important thing is you’re trying, and your kid will get there in her own time. Consistency counts more than perfection.
Sometimes you just have to pick your battles and keep it positive.
I get where you’re coming from, but honestly, I’ve found that sometimes “picking your battles” with brushing can backfire a bit—at least in my house. The more we let our son skip or do a half-hearted job, the more he pushed the limits, and before we knew it, he’d gone a few days with barely any brushing at all. It was kind of a wake-up call for us.
What actually worked better (for us, anyway) was setting a really clear, non-negotiable routine—like, brushing happens every night, no matter what, but he gets to choose the song or the toothbrush. Giving him small choices within a firm boundary seemed to help. I know every kid is different, but I think sometimes consistency has to outweigh “making it fun,” even if it means a few more tears at first.
Not saying my way is perfect, but just wanted to throw it out there in case anyone else is stuck in the same loop. Kids are stubborn, but they’re also pretty adaptable when they know what to expect.
Giving him small choices within a firm boundary seemed to help.
That’s pretty much how I had to handle it with my youngest, too. If I let her skip even once, she’d try to make it a habit. It’s wild how quickly they figure out where the line is.
On the wobbly teeth front, I’ve heard all kinds of “tricks” but honestly, the only thing that ever worked for us was patience. Tried the apple-biting thing—sometimes it worked, sometimes just made her mouth sore. She did like wiggling it herself, and as long as it wasn’t painful or bleeding, I let her mess with it. I know some people swear by tying a string and slamming a door, but that’s just asking for drama (and probably a trip to the dentist).
Did anyone else’s kid get super anxious about losing teeth? Mine would get worried it’d hurt, but once the first one came out, she was all about it. I think half the battle is just making it seem normal and not a big deal. Curious if anyone actually had luck with any of those “weird tricks” or if most just waited it out...
That string-and-door thing always sounded like a recipe for disaster to me, too. My son was really anxious about his first loose tooth—he’d get all worked up thinking it was going to hurt, and honestly, I wasn’t sure what to do at first. We tried the “eat a crunchy carrot” suggestion, but he just ended up nibbling around the tooth and getting frustrated.
What ended up working for us (after a lot of trial and error) was this: I let him wiggle it whenever he wanted, but set a rule that if it started bleeding or hurting, we’d take a break. He liked having some control over it. When it was super wobbly, we used a cold, wet washcloth—he’d bite down gently and then pull. Took a couple tries, but it finally popped out without any drama.
I think the main thing is not making it into a huge event. I tried to act like it was just another part of growing up, and once he realized it didn’t hurt much, he was actually excited for the next one. Never had much luck with any “tricks,” though—just patience and letting him set the pace seemed to be the key.